On movie sex and movie love...

Category: Musical

La La Land

  • YEAR: 2016
  • DIRECTOR: Damien Chazelle
  • KEY ACTORS: Ryan Gosling, Emma Stone
  • CERTIFICATE: 12A
  • IMDB SCORE: 8.0
  • ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE: 91%

SEX SCORE: 4/5
✔️ This is very rewatchable, and I get something new from it each time.
✔️ The cast are incredibly fuckable. When are either of them ever not?
✔️ And it did inspire fantasies. Who doesn’t want to dance with a beautiful partner above the LA sunset?
✔️ Technically it passes the Bechdel Test but it’s a close call. Are characters truly ‘named’ if they’re only named in the credits? Is one conversation really enough?
❌ There isn’t really any sex in the movie to work out sex positivity but the gender politics haven’t really aged well so I can’t give it a mark!

Continue reading

Moana

  • YEAR: 2016
  • DIRECTOR: Ron Clements, John Musker
  • KEY ACTORS: Auli’i Cravalho, Dwayne Johnson
  • CERTIFICATE: PG
  • IMDB SCORE: 7.6
  • ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE: 95%

SEX SCORE: 3/5

✔️ Interestingly for a movie with a female lead and no romantic storyline, the Bechdel Test is not an easy answer, although this is more related to nuance in the test rather than the movie. Is Gramma her grandmother’s name? Do non-romantic discussions about a man count? Despite these arguments, it’s a clear pass to me!
✔️ But there is no doubt that it is rewatchable. It has the key Disney features of great music, great visuals and inspiring characters, and it’s wonderful!
I don’t want to fuck the cast. Perhaps unlike other Disney movies, Moana is a much less sexualised character and definitely more like a child than some of her predecessors. Which is an important step forward!
❌ And similarly, it didn’t inspire fantasies. It’s just not that kind of movie!
✔️ Is it sex positive? I am going to give it a mark as I can’t find a reason not to. Sex and relationships really aren’t part of the plot but I like that Moana isn’t pressured into marriage and it is feminist and body positive so that’s good enough!

Continue reading

Beauty and the Beast

  • YEAR: 1991
  • DIRECTOR: Gary Trousdale and Kirk Wise
  • KEY ACTORS: Robby Benson, Paige O’Hara, Richard White, Angela Lansbury, Jerry Orbach
  • CERTIFICATE: U
  • IMDB SCORE: 8.0
  • ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE: 94%

SEX SCORE: 3/5

✔️ As a film I’ve easily watched in advance of 40 times, it would be hypocritical of me to say it is not rewatchable.
❓ I want to fuck the cast in fantasy more than reality. Angry men in a scene, yes. Angry men in reality, no. However, Belle is an absolute babe. 
✔️ It did inspire fantasies. So very many. ‘If she doesn’t eat with me, she doesn’t eat at all!’ – do I have to say any more…?
❓ In some senses it is sex positive, mostly in the way it approaches consent, but love and sexual relationships are treated as something for adults, to be understood by adults- as Chip’s questions get brushed aside.
❌ A film with few female conversations leaves little opportunity to ascertain whether it passes the Bechdel Test. Belle is the only human female ‘character’ and only named woman in the film’s dialogue except Mrs Potts. Belle, Mrs Potts and the wardrobe (unnamed) have a conversation about Belle’s bravery for switching places with a man as a result of the actions of a man. Wardrobe also converses with Belle, but this time solely about how good she’ll look for a man.

Continue reading

Little Mermaid

  • YEAR: 1989
  • DIRECTOR: John Musker, Ron Clements
  • KEY ACTORS: Jodi Benson, Samuel E. Wright, Pat Carroll
  • CERTIFICATE: U
  • IMDB SCORE: 7.6
  • ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE: 93%

SEX SCORE: 2/5

✔️ This is definitely rewatchable. And I have watched it many, many times!
✔️ And it does pass the Bechdel Test – she speaks to Ursula about more than just Eric and her sisters are named in their introduction song.
❌ I don’t want to fuck the cast. I’ve always had a problem with Eric’s eyes – I can’t explain it but I don’t like them – and Ariel is a child.
❌ And it didn’t inspire fantasies.
❌ But is it sex positive? I don’t think it can be – ‘Kiss the Girl’ is a song about avoiding consent and the villain is a queer-coded drag queen.

Continue reading

Frozen

  • YEAR: 2013
  • DIRECTOR: Jennifer Lee and Chris Buck
  • KEY ACTORS: Kristen Bell, Idina Menzel
  • CERTIFICATE: PG
  • IMDB SCORE: 7.4
  • ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE: 90%

SEX SCORE: 4/5

✔️ This obviously passes the Bechdel Test! It’s about sisters who have more problems than just men.
✔️ And it’s definitely rewatchable. And re-singable and re-laughable…
✔️ OK so this animated series is going to get kind of weird when it comes to this particular question but, yes, I would fuck the cast. Kristoff is hot and kind and feminist, and the princesses are beautiful!
❌ But it didn’t inspire fantasies. I don’t have a princess kink and, while there is certainly something about snuggling up warm when it’s snowy outside, this movie didn’t inspire those kinds of fantasies!
✔️ As far as a Disney film can be, this is sex positive! There are important messages about consent and not rushing intimacy.

Continue reading

Grease 2

  • YEAR: 1982
  • DIRECTOR: Patricia Birch
  • KEY ACTORS: Michelle Pfeiffer, Maxwell Caulfield
  • CERTIFICATE: PG
  • IMDB SCORE: 4.4
  • ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE: 38%

SEX SCORE: 4/5

✔️ It is absolutely rewatchable. I’ve not watched it as much as I have the original but it is no less addictive!
✔️ And it easily passes the Bechdel Test.
❌ But it is not sex positive! They are critical of virginity, the woman aren’t satisfied, there’s a lot of casual sexual harassment and the gender politics just aren’t good…
✔️ I do think the cast are fuckable – Michelle Pfeiffer is super hot and Michael looks really good, even if he shouldn’t speak!
❌ But it didn’t inspire fantasies. Not sexual ones anyway! I’d wanted to be as cool as Stephanie but I wasn’t that interested in reproducing the romantic plot line.

Continue reading

Moulin Rouge

  • YEAR: 2001
  • Director: Baz Luhrmann
  • KEY ACTORS: Nicole Kidman, Ewan McGregor
  • CERTIFICATE: 12
  • IMDB SCORE: 7.6
  • ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE: 76%

SEX SCORE: 4/5

✔️ It does pass the Bechdel test…but only just! Satine has a conversation with Marie, her dresser, about being a star. That’s it.

✔️ And, oh my gosh, I want to fuck the cast! It’s difficult to argue whether this is either of McGregor or Kidman’s peak hotness because they have just had so many peaks but, damn, they are beautiful in this movie…

✔️ It’s also incredibly rewatchable. If I come across it on TV, I will always watch it, no matter where in the movie we are.

✔️ And Moulin Rouge did inspire fantasies. Not of sex work but of being that beautiful, that glamorous, that sexually confident…

❌ But it is not sex positive! It’s not sex worker positive, it’s not feminist, and it values virginity much too highly!

As always, this contains spoilers so watch the film before you read on…

STREAMING: Amazon Prime (rent £2.49, buy £6.99), YouTube (from £3.99). For a full list of streaming options, check out JustWatch.com

Continue reading

The Rocky Horror Picture Show

YEAR: 1975
DIRECTOR: Jim Sharman
KEY ACTORS: Tim Curry, Susan Sarandon, Barry Bostwick
CERTIFICATE: 15
IMDB SCORE: 7.4
ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE: 80%

SEX SCORE: 3.5/5
✔️ So Rocky Horror passes the Bechdel Test, but this is another example where it can be argued that its passing is ‘dubious.’ It does literally pass the binary test, but all the qualifying conversations between named female characters are still about sex…just sex with a woman.
✔️ It is rewatchable. But I’d recommend watching it at the cinema if at all possible – it is so much more fun that way!
✔️ And I do want to fuck the cast. They’re all either very extreme or very normal, but the characters are so horny that they have an undeniable appeal. Also, I love a man in stockings…
❓ Unsure if this really count as inspiring a fantasy as it didn’t get quite as far as a full-blown fantasy, but this film is certainly the first time that I saw a man in heels and stockings look so good and, lets just say, it changed things!
❌ But considering how revolutionary it was at the time it was released and how important it has been to queer representation, I don’t think Rocky Horror is sex positive. Frank is too predatory; Rocky is too exploited; Janet is not a slut. It’s wonderful but its sexual politics haven’t aged so well.

Continue reading

Dirty Dancing

YEAR: 1987
DIRECTOR: Emile Ardolino
KEY ACTORS: Patrick Swayze, Jennifer Grey, Cynthia Rhodes
CERTIFICATE: 12
IMDB SCORE: 7.0
ROTTEN TOMATOES SCORE: 71%

SEX SCORE: 5/5
✔️Definitely rewatchable – the soundtrack alone would tempt me to watch it again before even considering the dancing!
✔️ And yes, I’d want to fuck Patrick Swayze at his peak. Didn’t we all?
✔️ For a film made in the 80s when rape and misogyny were often amusing plot points, this is such a sex positive film! It supports easy access to abortion, and the coming of age through holiday romance, hot hot sex and dance. It would rank higher than a lot of more modern movies; it’s extraordinary.
✔️ Just as Up in the Air is an archetypal hotel fuck movie, this is the holiday romance movie to inspire all holiday romances. Of course I wanted the hottest guy on holiday to notice me and want me and fuck me in secret and then publicly announce his love for me. It’s the dream of a teenage girl who never thought she’d be noticed but it’s still a great dream… Oh, and I always always always want to dance like I’m being fucked. It’s everything.
✔️AND it passes the Bechdel Test! Only the second 5/5 film yet!!

Continue reading